How Grieving Moms Affect Change

Today, on Mother’s Day, I think it’s appropriate to talk about the people who really make change happen, or the ones who at least see the need and take a stand. That’s mostly Moms. Talking about grieving moms is not necessarily the ones who’ve lost a child. A Mom can grieve their children in many ways. As I sit here looking out the window on Mother’s day, I grieve the daughter I lost. But I also grieve the son who sits alone and suffers the consequences of actions he completely regrets. Missing him, missing Erin, and so grateful for Mandy, who is my rock and inspiration.

When Erin died, I strongly felt that had a security system, with a panic button, been in place that would have changed what had happened to her. And I still do. I fought during that time to make businesses in Aroostook County and beyond to understand that. I wrote letters, did surveys and got involved with a security company that would install those systems for free. I testified before the Maine legislature about the importance of protecting our young workers and headed a committee to discuss that. Through Erin’s Fund I was able to install 18 systems at small businesses in the County that had young workers and advocated for more. I never gave up on that, and still look for systems in every business I frequent.

The committee was made up mostly of people who didn’t want to add the financial burden to businesses and argued every point I made. Eventually it wore me down. I remember the last meeting I attended becoming so overwhelmed with grief I left crying and couldn’t pull myself together. I knew they were not going to help affect change and they saw it as a money issue, not a people issue. That change never occurred and it’s been 16 years.

The same is true of our drug situation. It’s Moms who fight for things that will change the world. It’s Moms who look at the broken system and cry foul. Most times it’s too late for their child, but not always. I guess the thing to remember when looking at systemic change and fighting for it, is to understand where the money comes from. As I have seen from extensive research that money comes from the pharmaceutical companies who refuse to stop pushing addictive products on society.

I comes as a result of their lies, manipulation and profits. Tons of those profits are used to influence our government and help elect officials that benefit from their actions. And then punish those who use their products to the highest extent possible. We have lost millions of lives to those actions. There are millions of grieving families who have felt the impact of their financial actions. The desire to fix this won’t come from the companies who would lose money but from somewhere else.

It will come from these Moms. It will come from me. I won’t stop until I sit in front of congress and testify to what I know. Nor do I accept a government elected by grieving Moms that continues to perpetuate the problem. I will write to every member on Congress, the President and the Attorney General until my views are heard. I will insist on being heard not matter how long it takes, because what they are doing its wrong.

I am a grieving Mom.


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